Empathy is not…

EMPATHY IS NOT ENDORSEMENT ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
~ Dylan Marron⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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When we feel slighted, misunderstood, hurt and rejected, it can be so easy to hit back. Either at them who we feel hurt by. Or by projecting hurt onto to others in a victim-cum-perpetrator maneuver. ⠀⠀⠀
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Sometimes this sneaks up on us without realising; it’s so engrained in social and family norms. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Problem is, when we do this unchecked, we crank the ‘drama dial’, triggering ripples of pain, hurt and rejection. Inevitably perpetuating volatility & toxicity.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Thank goodness the human heart is a strong entity, with an amazing capacity to move beyond the hurt in a healthier way… ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Empathy - the art of connection with how another is feeling. ⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Empathy can go a LONG way. It’s one of the most powerful emotional transformers I know. When an upset human knows they are seen & acknowledged in their sadness, fury, frustration etc, the path beyond tends to open up. A path that can lead to some sort of easing of the intense emotional experience.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Too often empathy is confused with endorsement. As in, acknowledging the circumstances contributing to perpetrator’s actions of harm is somehow encouraging that to happen more.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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No, no, no! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Empathy allows us to go deeper. It takes our hand to move through the tangled vines of contributing factors deluding the human psyche. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Empathy is emotional maturity. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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We must remember the heart is a muscle - one to be developed & maintained. It needs to be utilised. No less on ourselves than on others.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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When we live the art of empathy, we learn to unveil the blame & move closer towards helping people get their needs met. Which is ultimately driving a person’s actions in the first place.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Go forth and connect.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
💜🌻